Category Archives: Let’s Hear It For The Boys

Shaving Soap Opera. Mo More @Movember @HitLitPro pic.twitter.com/AIEZ23wYBb

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Shaving soap opera: It’s over.  It’s not you – it’s me. You’re always there. You’re part of me but I need space for myself.

Mo More Movember. The party is over. Call in the guys from Disney, string up the violins. A defenceless hairy creature faces the chop. Yes it’s the end of the line for the tash. Both Oscar and I have agreed that despite its value as a foolproof contraceptive, the furry beast is coming off. I’ve decided I just don’t write enough about kissing. Once the thing is gone I’m gonna grab him for a snogathon and report back. If some good woman had shaved off Stalin and Hitler maybe they would have had more pleasure and focused on better things in life.

It has been an interesting month. A procession of visitors both French and English have offered opinions on the thing. It’s a strange thing to loiter about while various women discuss whether your man is more or less attractive with or without. Oscar preens and struts offering trial kisses.

I’ve been fascinated by the vocabulary around the tash. Words like distinguished, sexy, aristocratic and artistic actually mean mad looking scruffy old goat. One lady said it made him look more like a poet. When I questioned her she admitted what she meant was mad looking scruffy old goat. 

In rural France most males are in a permanent tash cycle between periodic shaves. In colder weather the period is often extended to fit in with other toiletry procedures. It’s a job to know who has a tash and who hasn’t.

Get in the mood. Slip something satisfying in your stockings



So – there it is. Now it’s back to lining up on Runway One for Christmas. I’ve started already with a big turkey fest for all the family I won’t be seeing on the day. The tree is a treat, the pies are mincing, the prezzies are piling. And guess what I’m giving as little stocking gifts? YES – it’s the Hit Lit Pro Movember Anthology  “Let’s Hear It For The Boys“. Go on girls – slip one in with his bag of nuts and help to keep him healthy.


Emma Thinx: The tash: you don’t know what you’ve snot ’til its gone. 





Tickled Pink By Barbara’s Whiskers @HitLitPRo pic.twitter.com/XeS2X3e120 #Movember #charity #novel

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Pink lady with the heart of a wing commander

The colour pink for me means Barbara Cartland, the romantic novelist. She was a deeply conservative ultra posh lady who became Princess Diana’s step grandmother I think. Apparently she did not get on with Diana and was not invited to her marriage with Charles. My personal recollection of her was when she said:


“I have the body of a young girl. I haven’t got a single line on my body. I often think I should be photographed naked”

Well, she was only 95 at the time. In fact I don’t have a single line on my body. All of mine are at least double or triple lines. I think I should be photographed by naked photographers. 

She was a Dame Commander of the British Empire and a knight of the order of Saint John. She wrote  a huge number of novels and holds the Guinness Book Of Records title for the most novels published in a year – 23 titles in 1983. It makes NaNoWriMo look pretty limp. In all she sold 1000 million books, mainly romances but also about the health benefits of honey and vitamins. 

But, her writing was but a small part of the story. She is also credited with inventing the idea of towing gliders behind powered aircraft as a means of defeating Nazi Germany on D day. It is widely rumored that in in order to convince the Air Ministry of her discovery, she wore a wing commander mustache. Quite simply the top brass would not take her seriously dressed in pink chiffon. This is one of the great untold stories of World War 2. Anyone doubting the truth of this should check out the 1984 Bishop Wright Air

Barbara had balls enough to fly gliders

Industry Award which acknowledges her contribution. 


The woman was a marvel. She was involved in racing cars and brought out an album of love songs recorded with the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra. Reading her life story is an inspiration. Just think – all her heroines were gasping horrified virgins. Now that’s where I’ve been going wrong!

Now, Babs is the last of my hairy honeys. All of these women lived in the daring spirit of Movember. Now you can do your bit and buy the bloody book. Let’s Hear It For The Boys


Emma Thinx: Every candy floss is heavy with a child’s hope.

Mustache On The Orient Express @HitLitPro @MovemberUK @Movember #Charity #book

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Agatha on 30th Movember 1926. 

Agatha Christie was one the world’s greatest crime writers. From Miss Marple to Hercule Poirot she created some of the most enduring detective heroes of literature.

Far greater than anything she wrote was the story of her own disappearance on December 3rd 1926. This remains the greatest of her mysteries. Many learned books have been written about what may have happened. It is known that her car was found abandoned in Surrey, a county of southern England. Ten days later she was uncovered at an hotel in Harrogate, Yorkshire – a point hundreds of miles to the north. She was staying there in disguise. In the meantime the entire British police service and the general public were looking for her. The first ever aerial search in Britain was carried out over the area where her car had been found.

David Suchet as Hercule Poirot

Photographic evidence that has just come into my possession has revealed the true reason for her disappearance. Only now can I expose the facts. Yes – she had grown a mustache. The date of her disappearance is significant. She had grown her new friend during the month of Movember. At the end of the month her friends and publishers knew that her adoring public would never accept her new persona. In those days sistas had fewer life options. Her marriage was on the rocks and her mustache was her only friend and link to the true love of her life – Hercule Poirot whom she had met on the blank page of life in 1920. It was classic Pygmalion complex. Her mustache was a homage to her famous detective. Rather than lose the mustache, she ran away to Yorkshire. It was one place where she could hope for acceptance.

But why Yorkshire? Come on folks – it’s just so obvious my dear Watson. Harrogate was a watering hole of the Brontë Sistas, who published their original stories and poems under male pseudonyms. This was a place where scribe-sistas routinely took on the personas of men.  It’s all so clear when  a great detective translates the clues. There will be a meeting of everyone involved in the dining car later but you guys reading this, need not attend. 

Orient Express dining car. Her clue could reveal a detective’s identity



A dull thud broke the silence at Calin Towers

In the meantime a mysterious thud brought the maid running out into the hall at Calin Towers. Fearing that yet another murdered aristocrat had tumbled down the stairs it was a fantastic surprise to see an Amazon parcel filled with the tactile real book editions of “Let’s Hear It For The Boys”. Now I can get on up and get out there on the trail. Let’s jam a copy under a few noses and see the results. If a picture is worth a thousand words it follows that a few thousand words are gonna be worth a picture with some celeb’ who secretly longs to meet me. Schimples.

Buy our bloody book etc ……. 

Emma Thinx: Tall stories show their legs in shorts.








We’ve Got Our Litz Bitz Out For The Boyz – @Movember @HitLitPro #Charity #book

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Feel’em Friday eh? If I had one like this I’d do it daily.
Open your saucy red top for some pun in the SUN

That’s done it. More cheeky headline slut-smut from the mistress of mischief. Yes – all us girls in the fab Hit Lit Pro team have got their litz bits right out there for all those boys who read the UK’s only great national paper for red blooded work hardened males and those who love them – THE SUN. 


My American readers may not know and love THE SUN as well as we do in the UK. To give you a flavour, today is “FEEL’ EM FRIDAY” – a medical feature encouraging men to unzip and slip their commanding strong yet sensitive hands around the old block and tackle to check it out for health issues. Oooh! I may have to stop in a minute to calm myself down.

When Kim heard she was in the same edition she dressed to impress


The fact is that THE SUN has featured the Hit Lit Pro “Let’s Hear It For The Boys” Movember men’s health charity collection. So far they are the only national to give us a plug. So – come on all you posh journalists and the BBC – you’ve got the same equipment down there! You get up to the same stuff as the hunky SUN readers. 

It says buy the book and help to save lives !!!!


Just think – we’re all in the same edition as Kim Kardashian. I hope she checks out her bits too. I sure check mine out but so far THE SUN has not shone on me. If we’re talking pound for pound value in female flesh I fancy my chances.

Look – forget all the hype and Emma sauce. We all need to be aware and not ignore things out of embarrassment or pride. This month it’s for blokes but we all know it’s all year for all of us. Girls – check him out – you know he just wants to share. 

And buy our bloody book……etc





Emma Thinx: Cancer hates a sentry. Shoot first. 

Wet Kissing Hairy Hunks In The UK – Moustaches for #Movember @RUSHHairBeauty @HitLitPRo

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RUSH to show off my book

Vanity, thy name is Emma. Today was salon day. Beauty creating fingers pampered my follicles. Anyway – grey is closer to blonde than my brunette ever was. I’m maturing towards the target of my true self. 

I have wonderful hairdressers at the RUSH Hair and Beauty Salon in Southampton. These guys are like personality heart surgeons. You go in as a tousled tramp and come out femme fatale. Good job I had an old ASDA carrier bag in my pocket to protect my new goldilocks from the latest Atlantic gale.

We are now 11 days into Movember. In our house things are getting hairy and it’s time for a snog report. I’ve always loved a good snog. An interesting fact is that unfaithful men and women will have extra sexual intercourse with the betrayed partner (due to increased arousal stimuli)  but withdraw from kissing them. It’s obvious really isn’t it. Kissing is far more intimate and – well – the other stuff is just shameless lounging by the gene pool with a spreading warmth of wine in your belly. Oooh – writing about kissing brings out my inner sun.

So – when the touch of true love gets hairy – does the emotion keep flotion? My response is that the old boy still snogs up fine. His response is that it pushes bristles up his nose and loses the moment. I tell him that orgasm is a sneeze in the soul for a woman. He tells me that in that case, for a man, it’s a runny nose.

That’s why only women can write romance.

Get the book on Amazon Worldwide – all proceeds to Movember

Emma thinx: If it’s right, the erogenous zone is you.